Each week, they meet to vent about what’s been going on in their lives as moms and invite you to vent along with them!
This time, we’re wondering…should pregnant first-time moms celebrate Mother’s Day?
This time, we’re wondering…should pregnant first-time moms celebrate Mother’s Day?
When you as a father show a genuine interest in your daughter and treat her with respect, you’re sending a very positive message to her. You’re telling her that all men should treat her in a similar manner. And darn it…they should!
Of course you want the best for your little girl, you want her to be safe, strong. You want her ready for anything – to face any challenge that comes her way, without worrying about her being over powered by some disrespectful guy. You certainly don’t want her seeking out dysfunctional relationships because of the way she was raised by her father. It’s important to be able to take a step back, look at your relationship with your daughter and evaluate it…leaving your pride and “Don’t tell me how to raise my kid” attitude behind you. Think to yourself what is best for your little girl.
Whether you or someone you know need help building a positive dad/daughter relationship or maybe just need a reconnect. There are some great tips here to help you on your way.
A great first step is to get involved in your daughter’s life. We all have rough, long days at work and put up with enormous loads of crap from people, but you’re a parent. You don’t get to come home after work and immediately turn on the TV or flip on your iPad? Reevaluate your priorities. By getting involved with at least one aspect of your daughter’s life, you will see a change in how connected the two of you are. Try maybe coaching her sports team or have dinner with the family a few times a week. Get to know the dads in her social circle is huge. Then you’re all on the same page.
Respecting her mother is and your own mother will speak volumes to your little girl about how men treat women. It will show her what she should expect in the future. Think about it this way. You love your daughter more than anything so always treat your wife the way you want your daughter’s future husband to treat her. Trust me, she is watching you for cues on how to behave with men.
Also hug her! Don’t EVER forget…no matter how old your daughter gets, never stop showing her affection. Hugs may not seem welcome when she’s a teen and is acting like she is embarrassed to be around you, but studies show that the teenage years are the most formative time for a young girl’s self-esteem. She needs those hugs – especially from her father.
To read more, go to sandiegofamily.com
Just because you have become a mother, that doesn’t mean you stop being someone’s child. The effects of an abusive, toxic, or damaging mother can be passed down through generations without you even knowing it. New mothers hoping to take their parenting down another, non-toxic direction have a tough road to travel.
Kathryn Smerling, Ph.D., LCSW, a family therapy professional who practices in Manhattan states, “There is an axiom in family therapy known as repeat and repair; you either repeat the same mistakes or repair them. Either you mindlessly keep the same cycle going that you experienced as a child or you decide to be the one to make the change. To stop a hurtful cycle in its tracks, you have to understand what about your childhood worked, and what didn’t. You can educate yourself about healthy parenting practices, and put your knowledge to work each day as you endeavor to break the cycle.”
Try hard not to let the past creep up on the present. These damaged roots influence just about everything in our lives — and go much deeper than you realize. The past is a part of you. The way you were raised influences psychological and emotional development. It can hinder your ability to move on in this world with purpose and comfort.
One thing we often do when trying to change patterns is overcompensation. Keep in mind though that trying to be the perfect parent all the time is incredibly stressful, and sadly, usually doomed to fail. You’re not Supergirl and shouldn’t try to pretend to be. Relax, take lots of deep breaths and be aware of your actions and what you’re trying to overcome.
Possibly one of the most important things to remember is to not forget about self-care. It’s so vitally important to remember to make time for self-care. Yoga classes, therapy, artistic pursuits, and hobbies. Remember what they tell you on a commercial airline flight – secure your own oxygen mask before helping others. It translates into many facets of life – you are no good to others if you can’t function properly yourself.
Don’t give up and DON’T GIVE INTO ANGER. Once you give in to anger and frustration you have lost. Stay on course, taking time for yourself when you feel overwhelmed. Talk to your spouse, friends and family for support.
To read more about this topic, go to romper.com
Okay this is really cool! You know how you like to keep your kids baby clothes for sentimental reasons but you never know what to do with them? You struggle to find a place to store them so you still have access to them but they inevitably end up in a box in the garage which completely defeats the purpose of saving them in the first place.
Good news has arrived. Thanks to artists and crafty moms, people are now turning old baby clothes into teddy bears called Memory Bears and they are a huge hit! If your not a fan of bears or your child likes a different kind of animal, it doesn’t have to be a bear…you can try any animal you like!
Check out this how to video!
To read more about Memory Bears go to simplemost.com.
There is and has been a definite decline in children’s social, emotional, and academic functioning. It has been apparent for years. Kids these days are constantly complaining that they are bored, and even worse they feel and believe that they are entitled in every sense of the word. When they get out into the real world, they are in for a sweet treat.
Occupational Therapist Victoria Prooday states, “As we know, the brain is malleable. Through environment, we can make the brain “stronger” or make it “weaker”. I truly believe that, despite all our greatest intentions, we unfortunately remold our children’s brains in the wrong direction.”
A few things we have done without even thinking about it;
Kids get everything they want, when they want it. We have the best intentions as parents to please our children and keep them happy. Unfortunately, we make them happy at the moment but miserable in the long term. When you are able to delay gratification to your child, you are helping them to be able to function under stress. By giving them immediate gratification every time they open their mouth, we are setting them up to be less equipped to deal with even minor stressors. These minor situations of stress eventually become huge obstacles to their success in life.
Our children also have very limited social interaction these days. Kids used to play outside for hours. Remember mom saying, “Make sure your back inside when the streetlights come on.” Unfortunately, technology has replaced valuable outdoor time. It has also made us parents less available to interact with our children. We need to keep in mind – most successful people have great social skills. This is something that we cannot substitute.
One of the biggest issues is Endless Amounts of Fun. There are no dull moments for them to sit and think, or decompress. The second it becomes quiet, we feel it’s our job to get them entertained again right away! We feel that we are not doing our job as parents if they don’t always have something fun to do. This is a HUGE mistake on our behalves. For example, when they go to school and it is time for handwriting or math, their answer is “I can’t. It is too hard or it’s too boring.” The part of their brain that is the workable “muscle” is not getting trained through endless fun. It gets trained through work. It’s very important in those times when they say they are bored, give them a chore to do. Have them do laundry, wash dishes or mow the lawn. This is not being a mean parent. It’s being a good parent.
Read more at deeprootsathome.com