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For San Diego Moms and Moms-To-Be

Programs to Help Military Families During the Holidays

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By Kaylah Jackson – Entercom ConnectingVets.com

104th Fighter Wing families participate in games and festivities at a children’s holiday party Dec. 2, 2018, at Barnes Air National Guard Base, Massachusetts. The Airmen spent time with their families and thanked them for their continuous support. The children were provided with the opportunity to talk to Mrs. Clause before the arrival of Santa Clause in a 104FW F-15. (U.S. Air National Guard photos by Airman Basic Sara Kolinski)

While for many the holiday season remains a joyful time to spend with family and friends, it can also be stressful. Purchasing gifts, entertaining, even arranging travel can sometimes ruin holiday cheer. This holds true for many military families as well.

If you’re interested in helping a family in need this year, or if you are part of a military family yourself that needs assistance, check out this list of organizations.

Trees for Troops

“Delivering the spirit of Christmas to military families—one Christmas Tree at a time.” Through generous donations, Trees for Troops provide free trees for military families all over the country. Last year, the organization donated and deliver over 17,400 Christmas Trees to 70 military bases and 250 trees to four international bases.

Toys for Tots

Since 1947, the Marine Toys for Tots Program has distributed 548 million toys to date. Through the Marine Toys for Tots Foundation, less fortunate children  receive toys during the Christmas season.

Pay Away the Layaway

Through donations from “Layaway Angels,” the organization travels throughout the country during Back to School and Holiday seasons to help families by pay off their layaway balance which often include gifts for children like books, toys, and backpacks.

Operation Holiday Joy

Junior enlisted military families have been able to enjoy over 320,000 toys and over 25,000 baskets of food for Thanksgiving and Christmas thanks to generous donations toward Operation Holiday Joy. Find your local YMCA branch here.

Operation Homefront

While the organization has multiple initiatives throughout the year to support the military, during this time of year, Holiday Meals for Military and the Holiday Toy Drive are in full swing. Military families can register for the various distribution events throughout the year. Meal kits include turkey, gravy, cranberry sauce, stuffing, and vegetables. Follow Operation Homefront’s Facebook page to learn about the dates of their toy drive and how you can receive or donate to a military family.

Want to get more connected to the great stories and resources Connecting Vets has to offer? Click here and sign up for the weekly newsletter from Entercom’s ConnectingVets.com

Holiday Lights – Where To See Them in San Diego

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There are great Holiday displays of Light all over San Diego.  We picked a few from North, South, East, and West to feature.  Where is your favorite place to see Christmas Lights in San Diego?

North County Coastal

San Diego Botanic Garden – 125,000+ lights illuminate the Garden.  Holiday crafts, visits with Santa, marshmallow roasting and more. Dec. 1-23 and 26-30, 5-8:30 pm. – sdbgarden.org

Carlsbad – Holidays at Legoland California – Experience the magic of the holidays with music, twinkling lights and a 30-ft LEGO Christmas Tree. Enjoy live entertainment, a holiday light show and character meet and greets at the Holiday Village. Nov. 17-Dec. 31. legoland.com

Oceanside – Oceanside Harbor Parade of Lights – Boats decorated in holiday lights circle Oceanside Harbor. Dec. 8, 7 pm – oceansideyc.net

North County Inland

Carmel Mountain Ranch – Fairway Village, east and west sides of Stoney Gate Pl. 100+ homes decorated in “Holiday Magic.” Dec. 15-Jan.1, 5:30-10:30 pm.

Poway – Hickory Ct.,Hickory St., Butterwood Ct., Rockrose Ct. All off Twin Peaks Rd. & Silverset St. named “Candy Cane Lane.” Entire cul-de-sacs are lit up. Dec. 8-24, 6-9 pm.

South Bay

Coronado – Hotel del Coronado Celebrate “A Christmas Legend” as this California gem transforms into a winter wonderland with Skating by the Sea, jingle s’mores, Polar Bear Tea, Santa Brunches, holiday parties and lavish feasts. From soaring red turrets decked in thousands of white lights to a Victorian lobby dressed in holiday splendor, visitors of all ages delight in the best West Coast winter. 1500 Orange Ave. 619-522-8490. hoteldel.com

Chula Vista – Whitney St./Mankato. Circle between First and Second Ave. off H St. & 1st Ave. “Christmas Circle.” 61st year of decorating 55+ homes. Dec. 8-26, 5-10 pm.

East County San Diego

El Cajon – Jingle Bell Hill (also known as Pepper Dr. Lights). Solomon Ave./Pegeen Pl. and surrounding area. Off 67 & Bradley. Dec. 8-26, Mon-Th, 6-9 pm, Fri-Sun, 6-10 pm.

San Diego Central

Jungle Bells at the San Diego Zoo.  The Zoo will be aglow with holiday cheer and activities to keep the whole family jolly. Seasonal decorations, animal experiences, costumed characters, live entertainment and more. Dec. 14-Jan. 6, 9 am-8 pm (until 5 pm Dec. 24). Free with Zoo admission. 619-231-1515. sandiegozoo.org

Clairemont Mesa – Lana Dr. & Jamar. Off Mt. Abernathy Ave. Circular street. “Clairemont Christmas Park”. 40+ homes decorated. Dec. 1-25.

San Diego Coastal

Mission Bay Christmas Boat Parade of Lights. Over 100 vessels. Begins on Quivira Basin. Dec. 8, starts at 6 pm. 858-488-0501. mbyc.org

SeaWorld’s Christmas Celebration.  SeaWorld is decked out with more than a million holiday lights and a 40-ft. tree with an animated light show. Also visit Rudolph’s Christmastown, check out holiday-themed animal shows such as Clyde & Seamore’s Christmas Special, Dolphin Island Christmas and O Wondrous Night, a living nativity performed nightly under the stars, told through the eyes of the animals. New this year is Rudolph’s Movie Experience featuring special effects such as snowfall and the aroma of hot chocolate-daily in the park’s Mission Bay Theater. Nov. 17-Jan. 6.

San Diego Bay Parade of Lights. 47th Anniversary. “Tropical Island Christmas” theme. Dec. 9 & 16, 5 pm. Starts off Shelter Island, goes through the harbor and ends at the Ferry Landing, Coronado. sdparadeoflights.org

Melania Trump opens Africa tour with wave and baby in arms

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By DARLENE SUPERVILLE, Associated Press

ACCRA, Ghana (AP) — Melania Trump opened her first big solo international trip as U.S. first lady on Tuesday with a wave, a smile and a baby in her arms, aiming to promote child welfare during a five-day tour of Africa.

She arrived in the West African nation of Ghana after an overnight flight from Washington and quickly made her way to the Greater Accra Regional Hospital.

First lady Melania Trump holds a baby as she visits Greater Accra Regional Hospital in Accra, Ghana, Tuesday, Oct. 2, 2018. The first lady is visiting Africa on her first big solo international trip, aiming to make child well-being the focus of a five-day, four-country tour. (AP Photo/Carolyn Kaster)

The first lady saw how babies are weighed — they’re placed in sacks that are then hung from a hook attached to a scale. She also watched a nurse demonstrate how vitamins are administered to babies by mouth and toured the neonatal intensive care unit.

Mrs. Trump also cradled an infant and declared the baby a “beautiful boy” as she handed him back to his mother.

Mothers at the hospital for her visit received gifts of teddy bears nestled in white baby blankets, personally handed out by the first lady, according to her spokeswoman, Stephanie Grisham. The items carried the logo of “Be Best,” the child well-being initiative Mrs. Trump launched last May.

With the Africa visit, the first lady aims to take “Be Best” and its focus on opioid abuse and online behavior to an international audience.

The first lady also had a private tea with her Ghanaian counterpart, Rebecca Akufo-Addo. They exchanged gifts: a Chippendale silver tray embossed with an image of the White House inside a leather case signed by “First Lady Melania Trump” for Akufo-Addo, and Kente cloth and artifacts for Mrs. Trump, according to Grisham.

The first ladies met privately for about a half-hour at Jubilee House, Ghana’s presidential palace. The two first met last week in New York at a reception on the sidelines of the U.N. General Assembly, where Mrs. Trump spoke about her upcoming trip.

Mrs. Trump’s visit opened in low-key fashion. Several Ghanaians interviewed said they knew little about it.

“Did you say President Trump’s wife just arrived in Accra?” street vendor Awo Yeboah asked. “I don’t think I have ever heard her name, Melania.”

Other locals said they knew about the visit but didn’t know what Mrs. Trump was doing.

Mrs. Trump landed in the capital, Accra, on Tuesday morning after a more than 12-hour journey from Washington. She was welcomed at the airport with dancing and drumming, schoolchildren waving mini U.S. and Ghanaian flags and the gift of a flower bouquet. Akufo-Addo was at the airport to welcome her.

Mrs. Trump also plans to visit Malawi, Kenya and Egypt.

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Follow Darlene Superville on Twitter: http://www.twitter.com/dsupervilleap

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AP reporter Francis Kokutse in Accra contributed to this report.

Tips to Help Dads Connect with Daughters

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When you as a father show a genuine interest in your daughter and treat her with respect, you’re sending a very positive message to her. You’re telling her that all men should treat her in a similar manner. And darn it…they should!

Of course you want the best for your little girl, you want her to be safe, strong. You want her ready for anything – to face any challenge that comes her way, without worrying about her being over powered by some disrespectful guy. You certainly don’t want her seeking out dysfunctional relationships because of the way she was raised by her father. It’s important to be able to take a step back, look at your relationship with your daughter and evaluate it…leaving your pride and “Don’t tell me how to raise my kid” attitude behind you. Think to yourself what is best for your little girl.
Whether you or someone you know need help building a positive dad/daughter relationship or maybe just need a reconnect. There are some great tips here to help you on your way.

A great first step is to get involved in your daughter’s life. We all have rough, long days at work and put up with enormous loads of crap from people, but you’re a parent. You don’t get to come home after work and immediately turn on the TV or flip on your iPad? Reevaluate your priorities. By getting involved with at least one aspect of your daughter’s life, you will see a change in how connected the two of you are. Try maybe coaching her sports team or have dinner with the family a few times a week. Get to know the dads in her social circle is huge. Then you’re all on the same page.
Respecting her mother is and your own mother will speak volumes to your little girl about how men treat women. It will show her what she should expect in the future. Think about it this way. You love your daughter more than anything so always treat your wife the way you want your daughter’s future husband to treat her. Trust me, she is watching you for cues on how to behave with men.

Also hug her! Don’t EVER forget…no matter how old your daughter gets, never stop showing her affection. Hugs may not seem welcome when she’s a teen and is acting like she is embarrassed to be around you, but studies show that the teenage years are the most formative time for a young girl’s self-esteem. She needs those hugs – especially from her father.

To read more, go to sandiegofamily.com

Parenting Things You Don’t Realize You’re Doing Because You Had A Toxic Mother

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Just because you have become a mother, that doesn’t mean you stop being someone’s child. The effects of an abusive, toxic, or damaging mother can be passed down through generations without you even knowing it. New mothers hoping to take their parenting down another, non-toxic direction have a tough road to travel.

Kathryn Smerling, Ph.D., LCSW, a family therapy professional who practices in Manhattan states, “There is an axiom in family therapy known as repeat and repair; you either repeat the same mistakes or repair them. Either you mindlessly keep the same cycle going that you experienced as a child or you decide to be the one to make the change. To stop a hurtful cycle in its tracks, you have to understand what about your childhood worked, and what didn’t. You can educate yourself about healthy parenting practices, and put your knowledge to work each day as you endeavor to break the cycle.”

Try hard not to let the past creep up on the present. These damaged roots influence just about everything in our lives — and go much deeper than you realize. The past is a part of you. The way you were raised influences psychological and emotional development. It can hinder your ability to move on in this world with purpose and comfort.

One thing we often do when trying to change patterns is overcompensation.  Keep in mind though that trying to be the perfect parent all the time is incredibly stressful, and sadly, usually doomed to fail. You’re not Supergirl and shouldn’t try to pretend to be. Relax, take lots of deep breaths and be aware of your actions and what you’re trying to overcome.

Possibly one of the most important things to remember is to not forget about self-care. It’s so vitally important to remember to make time for self-care. Yoga classes, therapy, artistic pursuits, and hobbies. Remember what they tell you on a commercial airline flight – secure your own oxygen mask before helping others. It translates into many facets of life – you are no good to others if you can’t function properly yourself.

Don’t give up and DON’T GIVE INTO ANGER. Once you give in to anger and frustration you have lost. Stay on course, taking time for yourself when you feel overwhelmed. Talk to your spouse, friends and family for support.

To read more about this topic, go to romper.com

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