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Your Daughter Doesn’t Owe ANYONE A Hug

My SD Moms November 6, 2017

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We all know that the Holidays are a very “huggie” time of year. Long lost family friends show up out of nowhere, relatives from out of town visit and it seems like everyone you come across want’s a to give you a holiday hug. It can be rather overwhelming and stressful.

As much as your daughters love Christmas, they may not look forward to all of the hugs and touching that goes along with it – especially from people they don’t know or hardly know. Have you ever forced your daughter to give long lost Uncle Ben a big hug?” Maybe you’ve said “Aunt Cheryl spent a lot of time getting that toy for you. Go give her a big kiss and hug.”  If yes, you might want to seriously think about what you’re doing.

Consider this next time your forcing your daughter into giving someone physical affection. By making your daughter feel like she owes someone a hug for any reason at all is just wrong. It can set the stage for her questioning whether she “owes” another person any type of physical affection later in life. You’re setting her up for inappropriate physical relationships that you in effect will be yelling at her for having as she grows into a young woman. Girl Scouts’ developmental psychologist Dr. Andrea Bastiani Archibald states, “The notion of consent may seem very grown-up and like something that doesn’t pertain to children, but the lessons girls learn when they’re young about setting physical boundaries and expecting them to be respected last a lifetime, and can influence how she feels about herself and her body as she gets older. Plus, sadly, we know that some adults prey on children, and teaching your daughter about consent early on can help her understand her rights, know when lines are being crossed, and when to go to you for help.”

To read the very important article at Girlscouts.org, CLICK HERE

Tags: behavior birth child care christmas common problems communication daycare family kids self-care

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